June 2011
86 posts
2 tags
5.
I was sitting in the backseat alone in your car waiting on everyone to get in. This was the first time I had ever rode in your car. You went out to say bye to Charlene and was the first back. You look through the window and smiled, opened the door and sat down. You then randomly said, ‘Becca, you make me smile!’ Oh how red I felt my face turning. Once everyone got in, you drove us...
2 tags
4.
Once I heard your car drive up my street, I walked over the window to see you. Ohhh the look on my face when I saw you. I could feel my smile reaching ear to ear. Big hugs and big kisses. ‘Let’s go on a walk!’ I grabbed your hand and began walking down the street, more like skipping. Walking on lines with my arms wide out making it appear as an airplane soaring through the sky....
2 tags
3.
‘Can I come check you tonight before I head back?’ The first time you came to see me. I sat there anxiously waiting for you to arrive. I persistently walked to the window seeing if you had arrived yet and right when I calmed down a little, I heard your car driving up my street. I walked over to you in my PJ’s and no shoes. The cutest thing was seeing you stand there with your...
2 tags
2.
As I pulled up to the loading zone, you walked towards me looking quite nervous and then a big smile showed up on your face. I always loved this part of picking you up from the station. That radiant smile of yours always gave me butterflies. I waved for you to come to my side because I didn’t want to drive anymore. You stood before me in your camo uniform waiting for me to get out. And oh my...
2 tags
1.
Sitting across the table from each other, you aren’t too close nor are you too far. I observe you as you browse through the menu asking what I want to eat. As I was crossing my left leg over my right, I slightly tapped your leg which led to a little game of footsies. Debating on what to get, you flipped the pages back and forth to look at each image. I looked up at you to get a better look...
I'd rather spend one minute holding you than the...
10006.) To the people who ask what you do when you...
This.
I'm curious...
Do you still think about me? Do you miss me?
You know...
I’m never going to stop caring right? No matter how far you distance yourself from me or how little we talk, I will always care for you. It’s just who I am…
I Admit..
tedeezy:
I’m afraid we’ll talk less.
I’m afraid our conversations will get shorter.
I’m afraid we’ll have less to talk about.
I’m afraid we’ll start sharing awkward silences.
I’m afraid we’ll be less affectionate.
I’m afraid we’ll start seeing each other less & while we’re not seeing each other, you’ll meet someone with a better personality & I’ll lose you to that person.
Despite all that has happened so far this summer, it’s going better than expected. I’m enjoying the company and learning new things. It took me a while, but I realized that I should make the best of this summer and not let anything hold me back. (: Smiling cures all and that’s one thing I love to do the most. Get in my way and I’ll hunt you down. (:
Babe.
When You Don't Text Back..
tedeezy:
I assume the worst.
I jump to conclusions.
I think so negatively.
I imagine you with someone else.
I picture you replying to everyone else except me.
I feel lonely.
Dreams are such a tease.
Before last night, I had forgotten how your kisses felt and how your hand felt every time I held them. I had a dream last night that felt so real… I could feel those lips of yours pressing against mine and in between we both let out a small smile. Every time I leaned in for one, I got one. There was no hesitation what so ever. As we walked around, I held onto your hands. Your hands were...
When I’m driving, sometimes different scenarios of how I die would play out in my mind. Like…
What if I were passing an intersection and someone hit me on the drivers side.
What if I were dozing off and drove off an overpass.
What if I were sandwiched between two large trucks from both sides.
What if I were crushed by a truck because I was driving in the driver’s blind...
In all honesty, I can’t let go yet… I’ll put on a smile to hide it from the world, but I’m still hurting deep inside. I’m sorry… You know, when you walked me over to the stairs… I actually didn’t want you to let me walk up alone. But that hug you gave me before I walked away, I didn’t want to let go… When I got up there, I saw your dad...
June 18, 2011
Summary: Today was quite the adventure! Held Renato’s surprise early birthday party at Redondo Beach. Though there were complications with food, we ended up eating what my mommy made and snacked on chips. Him and I then had an emotional conversation which lasted quite a while. I apologize for making everyone wait so long. After we finished talking, I headed over to the table to get out the...
I have this habit of looking out my window hoping to see your car drive up my street again…
Routine.
My mornings and nights are so empty now. I used to get a calls at night telling me that you’re off to bed and in the morning when you’re walking to work. I woke up this morning at 7 feeling like I forgot to do something only to realize that it was that phone call. Those calls that made me sleep peacefully and wake up smiling. But hey, I guess it’s just time to grow out of it.
Before you assume, learn the facts. Before you...
You always talked about the future...
Where you would be, what you would do, and how many kinds you wanted. Four, I remember, and one named after you. Two boys, two girls. When you’re married, or even before that, you’ll move back to Saipan to be with your family. You’ll take over your dad’s shop and work with cars. You knew exactly what you wanted. Thing is, I rarely think of the future cause I know that if I...
